The Workplace Whiner
We probably all have that one person we really tried to avoid as much as we can; the person that loves to seek gossip, the perpetually drunk neighbor who seems to find you every time you are getting home, etc. These ones are easier to avoid; you can simply call a friend on your cell phone as you pass by them and comfortably walk past them, as I know some people do. But what do you do when you are stuck with a whiner at work? I read an article in the Wall Street Journal and I thought it was worth a mention. Research suggests that listening to a complainer at work actually lowers productivity. Prof. Robert Sapolsky at Stanford Univ. says that exposure to constant negativity can disrupt learning, memory attention and judgment. For myself, I know that an emotional complainer darkens my mood. …
Trying to stay neutral by nodding and saying yes can also backfire. That may actually turn around for the worse because the story would be that you agreed to everything and that you were the one saying the negative things. In this case, some workplace coaches suggest that, instead of nodding and listening, encourage the person to talk directly to the source of the gripe. So how do we fight off the complainers? (These I have paraphrased from the Wall Street Journal but feel free to post any of your suggestions!)
- Change the subject, e.g. by asking the complainer what’s new and good in their lives – Retreat mentally; I’m not sure how effective this is, but you can go to your ‘happy place’ – Ask the complainer what s/he intends to do with the problem – In meetings, allot some time for employees to air grievances However, this shouldn’t be confused with healthy conflict. Healthy conflict eventually leads to positive construction. But there should be more positive interactions such as support and encouragement that negative interactions such as disapproval and criticism.
Have a positive day!
